Saturday, April 30, 2005

don't panic 4.30.05

hitchhiker's guide was very good. the don't panic was downplayed and some changes... but it was good. and as dorky as i wanted it to be. so they "make the blog," i'll let you know i shared twizzlers with jaime if you catch my meaning and rachel giggled to my left, i was in a jaime/ rachel sandwich. the rachel sister is a pistol even though she can't see over counters and nicky marie will soon be free of her fundraising shackles. they may take you life, but they'll never take--

kandle's party was very good too, even including the headbutts and getting home @ 6 am. niffer came through and we danced with the girls of bad touch to the late 80's house/ r&b. there was vodka, i grew paper tits, the amandas played ratt and journey in the other room, we all realized that we were old as we waxed nostalgic about the best rock bands, caroline and i sat in the corner and yapped about those same bands with rachelle. later i will have fully beaten my kidney into a drunken pulp with most of the same kids at zippy's crucial bbq. and sanded and painted gully's new number 1 spot.


*if i had music i would leave this post cueing up 50 cent's "this is 50."


postscript:

samuelito's drunken master/ night in the clink mix:


1. robert johnson # drunken hearted man
2. mighty mighty bosstones # i'll drink to that
3. project pat # crash da club
4. minus the bear # monkey!! knife!! fight!!
5. the alkaholiks # only when i'm drunk
6. bounty killa # warlord nuh business
7. (irish drinking song?) # fuck you i'm drunk
8. mystikal # ready to rumble
9. rolling stones # street fighting man
10. dj shadow + dan the automator # fists of curry
11. gangstarr # suckas need bodyguards
12. d12 # fight music
13. fugazi # waiting room
14. shyne w/ kurupt + nate dogg # behind the walls
15. plaid # last remembered thing
16. pinback # concrete seconds
17. burning airlines # sweet deals on surgery
18. prince paul # handle your time
19. da lench mob # lost in da system
20. tool # prison sex
21. james carter + the prisoners # po' lazarus

Monday, April 25, 2005

the unlinked post 4.25.05

i will get back to blogging again soon; though i don't know why i should. here is an inaptly-named trilogy of reasons not to blog:

1. everything i want to say is too personal. like how i hate people who cannot use proper grammar/ grammar rules at all. how i would like to go on and on about how it's very boring to read people's posts on what they ate for dinner. how i would like to give advice such as "west indian/ caribbean men, stop hitting on homely, funny-looking white women. yes, they will be flattered and yes, they may take you home to help them with their dancehall or hip hop riddims; but then they go and tell their friends and we all get objectified and pigeonholed." i am a culprit too. friends, help me stop. i'm not the hottest fella but really... help me stop.

2. i have a burr up my ass. so when i talk about how stupid my little brother is, i don't want to hear the advancement of that concept, or memories of other times when my brother is stupid. i will insult him myself. he's family, after all. i am protective. there is more but it would personally attack some readers, and since i have 5, i don't want to cut out 40% of my readership. suffice to say, i am sensitive and have a burr up my ass. constructive commentary and criticism is good, but a person should know when they have crossed constructive and are being a jackass. silver.

3. i ain't got no job.

4. it's time to start working on fiction, on the NEW AND IMPROVED short story club, and on the new sports blog, which will hopefully enlist the skills of m-jr and perhaps other people, and will have shorts posts such as this:

i am so happy for adrian macpherson - the seminole, the gambler, the arena football qb, and now the 5th round pick of the n'awlins saints. aaron brooks' 14-40 passing days are bad quarterbacking. the team doesn't win, the offensive system is "chuck it long and go get it;" one of these days, the new orleans football franchise should try having a couple of winning seasons in a row before they become an NFL europe outpost, or before the fans sober up and start throwing spiked beads at the players.

5. i was up at almost 1 am this morning; and not just because i dutch oven'd myself. hours before an AM meeting that should be disastrously funny, i was thinking about how i should get a date book. electronic ones are uninspiring; iCal and Palm's calendar's annoy me; a wall calendar is too large to take with me; and pocket planners tend to have lines when i want open space. maybe a long flat week-long top-flipping book. then i realized it's true what some friends have said-- i am finicky.

hitchhiker's guide comes out this weekend. i'll be going with m-jr, the wondertwin, the lovely jaime, rachel, and el-d the curly.

p.s. last week i was in the park with samuelito and lana-p and we saw this couple lovingly plucking each other's eyebrows. seriously. thanks for the pic, lana.
eyebrowlove

p.p.s. what's the bug in your saddle?

Thursday, April 21, 2005

back to watch the OC 4.21.05

what's with the goofy mid-sentence cuts in this episode? was that FOX or was that a quirky directing move? and can some of these plotlines slow down enough for funny quips and snappy patter? we have returned to fistfights and the calling of other men "bitch" and i for one am overjoyed. i dig the little wisps of air brushing marisa's locks before the kiss.

and trey's just out of prison so he's allowed one obvious mistake. where were the little drug vixens when i was in high school? at stuyvesant? or at spence?

death cab was so much better at the black cat. they didn't start with lightness. they started with new year and moved into movie script ending and then company calls. then ended with transatlantacism. am i right, gully? i do hope this appearance on the OC makes them villa-in-france money; this and their major label debut.

>>you don't have to pay me to murder your husband<<

julie looks good in the american beauty red petal repose. "it looks like one of your movies" is a hot ass line, though. miss cooper's friend is...oops. that's a PI taking her p-i-c. and while caleb has a charming voice, this is the creepiest marriage i have seen since i last got divorced. man, was that something. something cold.

>>what's from the earth is of the greatest worth<<

summer is the hotness. zach is so up to something. it's all the look-backs. and body sprays? a comic book body spray? what geek would buy that? would it smell like fresh comic book? like norse sweat? like the air after cyclops' eyebeams? at least this is an interesting plotline. and here is another site about cyclops, 'cause he's my favorite, no matter how lame people think he was in the movie.

i know nothing about wine. luckily for me, silver is a classy classy guy. now, about everyone's favorite raw-foods dieter, kelly rowan-- i mean, kiki-- snnxxxx, snxxxx, sorry, fell asleep. started drooling.

p.s. while orlando bloom is a good looking fellow, i don't even think he could kick MY ass.

Thursday, April 14, 2005

well, convict, time to open your present 4.14.05

>>an OC recap<<

i want to live in california. all i have to do is have a hot house with a pool and a winding walk down and people will just come to my house. yes this is the house. come inside the rager, dude!!! but who comes to a party with a four-foot bong in hand? and who brought the concert-style sound system? at least trey can act like a bouncer. and get a little tail-- hey, he's out of prison, he can call it a little tail. or okay, i can. and the teddy bear... that was a bit much.

where was trey in the threesome? and i really thought this would be the ep where trey and marissa get it on.

and... no, wait. addendum. i want to live in california and throw drug free parties.

now, how much coffee do these kids drink? it's like crack rock to them. marisa, summer, seth, zack, are never in the student lounge without coffee. aren't there coffee lines? don't people go coffee crazy? does somebody spill on the video games?

marguerite moreau is hot. that's why she's on television, i suppose. but what happened to the show life as we know it?

julie cooper threw a shirt at a ratt concert. my favorite bad band. i wonder if i look like that when i get drunk and the hard rock comes on? and daughters? julie cooper only has one daughter. and a creepy afterthought in boarding school.

Monday, April 11, 2005

Mondays are for studying 4.11.05

This weekend we celebrated Ray-Ray’s birthday. She has soft lips. Heh. Sister Sorky is a funny kid. And a blast from the past came through named Ellie, who lived in my old dorm room 107 back in the day. I couldn’t remember why I knew her and I think that was it. I walked into my old dorm as a junior to see what set of ass clowns had taken my old tripe and they weren’t ass clowns at all. Good kids.

In two days I will be free to write more interesting prose and posts. For now, here is a mix. Also, I think I will start a sports-only blog. I bet you would all be really into it.

a mix made because all of my mixes are for women. this one is made with silver in mind but he will never get it because unlike my hs classmate i do not believe in the social man date as discussed in the nytimes. no matter how many times it's just me and silver out, or having dinner, or cuddling with basketball. you didn't read that.

1. mirah, million miles
2. the go! team, huddle formation
3. jhae f. bumba, lindsay lohan freestyle (big ass titties)
4. thingy, mayday
5. ac newman, most of us prizefighters
6. d'angelo, alright
7. the delays, wanderlust
8. sufjan stevens, for the widows in paradise, for the fatherless in ypsilanti
9. death from above 1979, romantic rights
10. fall out boy, where is your boy tonight?
11. pinback, concrete seconds
12. iron and wine, grey stables
13. little brother, the yo-yo
14. lyrics born, callin' out
15. tahiti 80, heartbeat
16. mclusky, friends stoning friends
17. the legends, breaking time, breaking lines
18. the earlies, bring it back again
19. thingy, my room has a TV
20. nappy roots, slums
21. stars, the big fight

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

dine in brooklyn. 4.6.05

i hate dinner, as you all know. but dine in brooklyn? sounds like the move. next week, april 11-20th. it's on like kublai khan. check the link for restaurants in your hood.

(thanks to gothamist)

Monday, April 04, 2005

the day of the year where there is hope in cincinnati and pittsburgh 4.4.05
and not just because it's nathan's birthday.

my pregame comment is for new mets manager willie randolph. willie. never ever use the word "battled." it was art howe's catch phrase last year and watching the mets battle was like watching a quadriplegic in quicksand reaching for the rope. you can do your subway commercials with joe torre, but don't use the b-word.

5 strikeouts from this year's fantasy hero, jeremy bonderman. and it's only the second inning! 11 strikeouts from martinez and only one ugly home run! a homer and double from beltran. mmm, beltran. 2 double plays from david wright. hm, david wright. you still my boy, blue.

UPDATE: sweet jeebus, man. thank you, closer braden looper, for allowing a hit and then back to back home runs, giving the reds the win. it's because you're a christian conservative, right? and you don't want new york to win? that was super, looper. at least you battled. arrrrrgh.

it's baseball day.

also, the anniversary of the assassination of the reverend dr. martin luther king.

and to switch gears, more cheesecake! emmanuelle chriqui is distilled hotness, pictures show her 'nuff respeck.
001
the new single is duck + cover 4.4.05
with b-side: swing + miss

aw, damn, i missed joel.


ACE


my wu-tang style is avoidance. i can define a problem in simple words, come up with solutions, and find ways not to complete the tasks. though not such a big fan of people, i know the best way to avoid the mundane is to immerse in conversation, slipping from group to group to place to place, deft in ducking and shirking--

for example, this weekend. i missed out on classmate ana's downtown party and studied a little. that is the rare case of unavoidance, bucking the trend... for about 40 minutes.

the next morning when i should have been searching for work i was packaging my old mp3 player for sale, telling lana-p about the violence of sin city, and still made myself late. the rice-a-homie was angry to have missed the previews. i'd seen them already, it seems, and they were not that interesting. in fact, they were long, especially the movie about the dogtown skateboarders. sin city was bomb ass.

i dipped uptown, stopped by the post office that saturday afternoon, with the wind bowing my umbrella out and bending a line of the frame 70 degrees. midtown was filled with siren sounds, and people leaving ringling brothers circus. they left slowly and they leapt in my way.

then over to the east side for 20 minutes of basketball with mjunior and nicky brooklyn and their friend kurt/ martha/ [i forget] in a dark bar, waitress hovering over us like she had OCD.

7.15: i faced the height of avoidance. a few days previously i promised to attend an engagement dinner/ celebration for a high school mate named jen. i should have been home working. or going to events held by starla or schnapp or classmate nenee or simply watching basketball. and i thought about not going, getting back to what's important for me, versus what might annoy others--

all of that warbling is to say i had a great time. and i will hire zoco as my personal cook if that whole pharma marketing thing doesn't work out.

though she is already married to her army man, the engaged jen has not had the ceremony. so our mutual friend zoco decided to toss a surprise dinner/ reunion. myself, elle-marie, two mothers, and jen r who has blossomed into a very hot swan. not that she was a duckling but she looks all adult. still makes bad star trek jokes, though, still sweet and goofy.

but the avoidance--

DEUCE


i met up with mjunior downtown, and sat in odessa with him/ countess ruby/ and nicky brooklyn. they were in a strange mood. but i remembered why i like them. the sharp towel whip-snap of the countess, the hard-to-read laughter of nicky b.

of course i ended up in queens, playing mvp baseball. because i am addicted. stayed to watch the baseball game. yes, that was sunday night and i arrived saturday. as long as no one smells me, i'm straight.

one issue to bring up-- mjunior and the wondertwin love a place on queens blvd called eats. solid food, little cafe/ restaurant that has a mix of families and made-up queens women, gold's gym enthusiasts, and young folks who have discovered the secret sunnyside of queens. solid little place. except for the coffee.

i am not always the most perceptive person. so it took until the second or third cup of coffee at eats to realize that i was drinking perhaps the worst coffee i have ever had. a little burnt, and just... not good. not a single taste, but lightly bitter. milk didn't help and sugar made it taste worse. now i am aching a little, the feeling i remember from drinking starbucks' coffee, but then i wanted to drink it all, take my refills, and keep talking about the wondertwin's brilliant television idea. which will involve your favorite ex-television and movie stars. some of them even getting shot.

not for real, you sick bastards.

quit volunteering to pull the trigger.

what?

you can't do that, that's illegal--

just read on--

TREY


there is a dark wood-paneled bar on the upper east side, where even new york's rich and famous, cultural and athletic elite, can find a place to stay under the radar, and get their drink on. some afternoons, after isiah thomas stops taking shots of cognac, stumbles off the chair, and starts calling rival basketball General Managers with ridiculous trades, george steinbrenner walks in.

and the a rotund bald man shuffles in, shades drawn in case the ny post reporters or the guy who beat his ass in the upper east side diner should recognize him. some money exchanges hands for a job well-- or poorly done-- by a man named wells.

think about it. wells got slapped around last night like he was auditioning for pimps up, ho's down. the balk? way to gift wrap one, pal. and why else would he hit giambi twice? who would want to hit giambi but the yankees, the team angry and trying to find a way to cut giambi, for the steroids as he was suspected to have done.

just a thought. the boys building mate sara was very sweet too.


p.s. next week, ray-ray will be in town to do up her birthday in the style that only syracuse and high-end hookers know well.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

opening day 4.2.05

i think david wells is on the yankee payroll. evidence comes later.

Friday, April 01, 2005

friday 4.1.05

i recognize those bears and that brick wall. that walk by the tennis courts-- watching last night's college basketball 3-point shooting + slam-dunk contest, i quickly recognized the WUniversity! WU in the house! since the final four is held in st louis-- a city without a pro basketball team and a college basketball team that is hit and miss at best at SLU, and no great facilities to speak of-- well, it was good to see the old fieldhouse. i don't think i saw any of my classmates there, ever, though. where is your school spirit?!

here is an interesting article tying the final four to the resurgence of st louis. yes, we have heard that one before from the lou. rings in a little bit like the claims that the olympics will jumpstart the NYC economy. kudos to columnist burwell for mentioning how the st louis streets were used to film escape from new york. a couple of nights in brick alleyways converted to dance club parking lots and you'll think you were in the movie too.

back to last night's exhibition- steve lavin taught me well during the 3-point contest-- fingertips in the seams; low center of gravity; drop the ass low; widen the feet/ base; flick with the middle three fingers. i also learned marshall faulk is coming off the bench, and that the dunk contest can be won by a lithuanian who went to eastern utah and then to the university of tennessee - chattanooga, the school with the dumbest mascot.

****


sin city is out! here is a negative review, and here is a positive review. battery park city at 3 pm, be there. arroz the rice-a-homie will be. i might make it too. buy tickets!

****


marshall faulk is coming off the bench?

****


i miss the mets already. opening day is monday and i am going to have to find a bar.

****


this has to be an april fool's joke:

SOUTH ORANGE, N.J. -- Seton Hall guard J.R. Morris has declared for the NBA draft, the school announced Wednesday.

Morris, a junior shooting guard, averaged eight points and 3.5 rebounds in 79 career games with the Pirates. He was averaging 10.1 points and 5.8 rebounds through 21 games in the 2004-05 season before coach Louis Orr suspended him for academic reasons.

"This is something I have been preparing for my whole life," Morris said. "I sat down with coach Orr and told him that I felt I was ready to take my game to the next level. I feel I am ready to take this step."


good luck, son.